Sunday, July 31, 2011

Weekends Best!!!


It was "HOT" hot yesterday. I tried my best to stay cool but I'm not sure I succeeded! The hair has been holding up pretty well so I'm considering keeping the style through the rest of summer. We shall see. I'm at least good for one more week! LOL



The girls trying to stay cool ! Nicki calls her sandals "jesus" shoes!


 This weekend our family had a family reunion in my hometown. I met some cousins for the very first time! I have a huge family which makes it a bit hard to get together all of the time. This year the siblings of my grandfathers parents decided to get together so that the next generation could learn of one another. My mom has been trying to do research on our ancestors which can be very had to tract if you are of African American descent, and also of American Indian descent which is the case for us.


The "Family Tree" that my aunt created for the reunion. We had a great time hanging out together despite the 100 degree weather! 




Think I have enough green? LOL Marc even tried to match me! 



Quisha's platforms! Its only fair that I show them since Nick's shoes made the post! 


Marc did not have to preach today so Nicki got a break from doing media and went to the 11:30 service at her  church (she usually does the early service and then comes to WABC to help out). She almost missed out on Sunday Best because after church today the bottom fell out of the sky! We figured why not just do a rainy day photo umbrella and all! LOL

As I have said before our weekends for the coming month will be crazy busy, but I will check in when I can! I've already pulled the suitcases out for some upcoming trips. I wish I could be one of those people that packed the night before (and packed light) but the excitement of traveling gets the best of me and I can't help myself!!!

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Sunday Best, Family Style!


I let Nicki experiment with my hair this week. Not sure how long I will keep it but this coming week low maintenance works for me. I'm trying to knock out some clean up projects at home before my schedule gets any crazier. 


Here is the picture of Quisha as promised. I would love to do braids but since my migraines have returned (stress and a high bp will do that to you) I'm pretty sure having someone work on my head for 6 hours and twisting hair in real tight would not be a good idea!


Of course the fashion diva in the house went all out! In 90 degree weather mind you!. I love her shoes but I don't know how she does it!


Its been rough around my home the last few months and Marc may have sensed that some beautiful yellow roses might be a great way to cheer me up! Of course it might also have something to do with the fact that he made some house calls to some sick and shut in members yesterday and he took them roses! If he gives roses  to someone else he brings them to me also! And that people is just one of the reasons why I love him. LOL


Speaking of the love of my life. I caught this blurry picture of Marc handing out candy after church today (he has those babies wrapped around his finger or vise versa). The sheer look of joy on his face is priceless. Not to mention his stylish suit!

August is our busiest month of the summer so my blog post will probably be few and far between. The men at WABC will start back this week working on more projects at church after taking a small break. I'll post some pictures when I can. Next weekend we have a church trip and the following week our big vacation begins!!! We have a family reunion this weekend and I'm praying the heat will have slacked off by then since the entire event is outside (and we all know how much I love the great big outdoors). I stayed in all week and when I went outside this morning I came close to going right back inside! Me and heat do not mix well! I hope everyone is having a great summer.....and staying cool!

Monday, July 18, 2011

Monday Morning Ramblings (picture form)


I decorated my Blackerry case with Disney stickers this weekend. Cost me $5.00 for the case and the stickers had just been sitting in my scraproom collecting dust!


One daughter took out her braids this week and the other had braids put in. I don't have a picture of Quisha because she has been sick the last few days with a sinus infection. Will post as soon as she lets me! LOL


Our men celebrated Men's Day this weekend. Marc has been praying for a few good men and they are starting to come. We never seem to lack for women in the church but he has been stressing the need for men to step up to the plate and I have to say we are being blessed by their presence in the ministry!


I grabbed these cute pjs from Sam's Club for $6.00! That's two pair of pajamas and a nightgown for $2.00 a piece! They will be great for some upcoming trips!


Speaking of our men they have been busy redoing our women's bathroom, the kitchen and tiling the fellowship hall. You can see some of the pics on our facebook page.

Last week the girls and I went to see Israel Houghton in concert! Oh my goodness it was hot as all get up, but it was worth standing in line for an hour in 100 degree heat (well maybe not) to see them in concert. We had the best time and I could barely talk when we got out! Now that's a good concert!

Our family has been going through a major crisis the last few months but thankfully we seem to be coming to the end of the tunnel. So grateful for prayers and encouragement we have received from family and friends.

Several getaways are in the schedule over the next couple of weeks so I may be absent from my blog from time to time. Its all good though because after the start of our year my family could really use the break! Excited about spending some time away connecting with our families (including a day trip with our WABC family, a family reunion in my hometown, several birthday/anniversary celebrations and Nicki and I may be off to DC at the end of August for the WOF conference). I promise to take lots of pictures!

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Worth The Wait


This weekend the girls and I along with two of our teens from WABC attended a Youth Conference called "Worth The Wait". I got a chance to sit in on the youth workers sessions, and the girls set in on a few of the teen girls sessions. At the end of the conference which took place over a 3 day period the youth got a chance to chat with Raven Symone and recieve an autographed photo. Nicki was beyond excited because she has been a fan since the Cosby Show (they are actually the same age-25). The subjects they tacked with the youth workers there included Youth Ministry in a Religiousley Diverse World (Rev.Vernard Hinton), The Emotionally Healthy Youth Worker (Rev. Alvin Georges, Youth Pastor at Mt. Lebanon Baptist) , Effective Planning for Effective Ministry Rev. Dwight S. Riddick, Pastor of First Baptist Church Franklin, and How to Move from Then to Now (Rev. Vernard Hinton). I even got a chance to connect with a few pastor's wives and women in ministry! At one point they had me manning a baseball machine (I assume that is what it was called) booth (did I mention that we also volunteered to help out). After several times bending up and down to pick up the baseballs my thighs started talking to me. After a few hours they started screaming! Three days later I'm still in pain. But I wouldn't have traded the weekend hanging out with my girls and nearly 600 teens for anything in the world. By the way over 100 youth gave their life to Christ this weekend! A big shout out goes to my friend Rev. Cardell Patillo and the ministry of Grove Baptist Church!

Tuesday, July 05, 2011

Monday Morning Ramblings!






We had a great celebration with family over the weekend. Yours truly was the party planner and this morning I'm suffering the effects of that (I'm pooped)! Its been a long week and weekend and it doesn't seem like the schedule is going to get any lighter! Our summer is jam packed and secretly I'm enjoying every minuet of it!





We wrapped up VBS Camp this past week and as usual my family put their best foot forward and did their thing! Nicki worked on media, did skits, and played baby carrier! Quisha left her preschool summer camp each afternoon to come help with food, role playing and teacher assistant whenever she was needed. Marc spent most of the week corrupting the babies and feeding the children candy before sending them back to their parents and grandparents! I had one job and that was to take pictures...so please explain why I was soo tired at the end of each day! LOL

We had a great service on Sunday and even gained a few new members when a  family joined at the end of service. Marc spoke about "The Faith That Says I Just Believe"! His scripture came from Psalms 27 and he talked about how we must trust God in the here and now. The faith that says just believe is the same faith that causes us to trust because of the yesterdays thereby giving us the faith to trust tomorrow!

 We don't have any big events in the month of July at WABC, but the men and a few women have been working their butts off to redo our kitchen, women's bathroom and fellowship hall. I will post pictures when the work is complete.

I have a few trips coming up in the next few months that I can't wait to share. We have a family reunion at the end of the month, a family vacation and possibly a day trip with our church next month. In a few weeks I get to go to an Israel Houghton concert and we have even penciled in a few ministry meet ups while on our family vacation.

Our family has been going through a rather large personal crisis the last couple of weeks that I can't talk about here, but a few of you that know about it have been praying on our behalf and I just wanted to say thank you soo much for all of the prayers. Still trying to get some stuff sorted and praying most of it will get resolved this week. Please continue to keep us in your prayers. I'm trying really hard to keep moving forward no matter what!

I forgot to add one last thank you to all of the ladies who contributed to my blog party last month! I was soo honored that you took the time out of your busy schedules to write such powerful words on my little old blog!  It especially helped me get through a truly trying month!

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Robbie Curlee

I saved one of the best for last! Robbie and I met via her hubby Jason.  Jason and I met via twitter, and struck up a conversation about church. At the time I was asking a lot of questions about Children's Church and he suggested I talk to his wife and some of the staff at BAF. He said from the beginning that he thought Robbie and I would get along. Boy was he ever right! You may even have seen some of our crazy conversations on Facebook and Twitter! As I have stated before there are very few women I call a "Soul Sista", but I can honestly say that Robbie is one of those friends. I can't wait for the day that we get to "meet" in person. We have already stated that Jason and Marc had better watch out because we guarantee there will be a lot of chatting, shopping and eating! LOL



Stay in the lines......

What an honor to share a little piece of myself with all you wonderful ladies.   Thank you my dear friend for allowing me to share a piece of my heart with you all.  My heart if full.

When first asked to guest blog I have to admit my Jonah complex leaped up only to be silence shortly by my fearless side.  Yes before you ask I do have many facets of who I am in Christ....LOL  On a daily basis I never know which side will show up. 

I have the awesome privilege of being a part of something that is way bigger than myself.  My husband Jason & I pastor a Multi-site campus for Bay Area Fellowship.  I have to say it is one of the most creative out of the box ministries I have ever been a part of.  It's also safe to say we like to push the envelope so to speak.   I have three amazing daughters Shelby my 18yr who just graduated high school and is the peace maker in the family. Micaiah my 15 year who is the joy in our family never a dull moment with her and my sweet Kenzie who is 10, she is the lover of the bunch and always makes you feel like you can do anything.

Life is good these days and I have been on this amazing journey with God. I still remember being a small child in school and teacher after teacher saying the same thing to me; " stay inside the lines miss Trigo."  I'm guessing the formality was their way of letting me know they meant business.  I have to admit it had a counter affect.  It seemed the more they told me to stay in the lines the more I stayed out of the lines.  It's safe to say as the years progressed by undying need for self expression poured out in my hair styles (don't ask), my choice of clothing, and my excessive need to be myself. 








Many times ministry is a bit like that. We worry about what others will think or we worry about offending others so we play it safe...stay in the lines never take risk.  Or we try to be someone else or compare ourselves to the fresh face of ministry.  So we go around one week to week trying to be someone we're not.  We jump from mentor to mentor but never developing who we really are.  The person God called us to be.   I encourage you regardless of where you minister whether it's to a church of thousands or a church of twenty...BE YOU!  You are fearfully & wonderfully made and God made you just the way He wanted.  Your life is meant for greatness.  My balance & your balance will never look the same.  It's not supposed too.  We have to learn that we are not the same. Each one of us possesses a unique Gift, a direct DNA to who God created you to be.

I can honestly say I'm glad that I'm still that little girl in many ways today.  I still have trouble staying in the lines and I've never lost my zeal for coloring out of the lines.  Many days I am tempted to compare myself or change who I am.  I am human made of flesh working out my relationship with God daily.  I get tired, frustrated, hurt, offended, overwhelmed or a variety of emotions on a daily basis.  I am reminded daily that I need "Jesus" and that without Him I fall short. 

I pray you find your zeal, your passion, your gift and you use it for God's glory.  I pray you live out everyday full out for God and that when you lay your head you do it knowing you gave it your all.  You made a difference.  So don't be limited by the lines they are there just to guide you not to bind you. 

much love & prayer
Robbie Curlee
baf5points

Jeremiah 29:11

Monday, June 27, 2011

Shelley Hendrix-Church4Chicks!


Its because of Shelley that I even attempted doing a blog party (great ideas have to start somewhere..lol)! Last year Shelley surprised me by asking me to join a group of dynamic women for a blog party ! I was so honored that she included little old me, that I couldn't imagine hosting a blogging party without her being a part of it. I hope you enjoy her post. I know that she has inspired me to follow my dreams! 



In the spring of 2004 I was facing the most difficult challenge of my life—up to that point anyways. I was faced with a painful choice: allow God to unveil my carefully concealed and tightly locked shame, or continue to keep it under the paper thin wrappings and bide my time until another day. Thankfully, and with the loving support of my best friend and husband (the same person!), I began my journey to healing and freedom. And in that season of deep, humbling, raw pain, I received a gift.
                As I turned 30, I also received the call to ministry—the call upon my life. This was the beautiful and wonderful gift my Heavenly Father had been waiting until the right time to give me. The thing I had wondered about and prayed for for as long as I could remember. I had tried so many different things searching for my purpose and had finally settled—happily for the most part— into the roles I filled: ministry wife, mother, Sunday School teacher. If someone had told me in the Winter of 2003-2004 that I’d be doing what I’m doing now, I would have thought they were picking up on someone else’s signals— someone more capable, more intelligent, more of all the things I lack, but wish to possess.

 But then, God made it so clear. In a way that only God can, He revealed the call: to be a voice of truth in my generation.
                Without going into detail, let me just say that not only did God make this call clear to me, He confirmed it through others, beginning with my husband who said, “God has been telling me that as you’ve supported me (in ministry) all these years, it’s now my turn to do the same for you.” It hasn’t always been easy. It isn’t always easy. But Stephen has definitely supported his wife all these years! And as doors to speak and write began to open—with no promoting of myself to anyone—God began to clarify the call even more.
           In the summer of 2007, after I had been traveling to speak at different events and had done a little writing as well, I met with my very dear friend and ministry assistant, Debra. I wish everyone had a “Debra” in their life—especially those in ministry! She is a gem. Debra and I have been through SO much together over the years and we continue to be closer than most women who share our age and background differences. (Sidebar: isn’t is amazing how God does this?)
   Debra and I met for lunch. I remember the spot. I remember the table where we sat. We were talking about what we sensed God was doing with this ministry. At the time, I was still teaching a weekly Bible study at our home church. I don’t remember thinking along these lines before that day, but as we spoke, I said, “What if we could take the best of what we see happening in our weekly study with the best we see in special events and combine them for women all over our community?” And as I spoke those words—everything changed. In that moment, God created the embryo if you will that has grown into Church 4 Chicks. And, just as a woman has no idea she is pregnant when the child is first conceived, I had NO idea what God was creating inside of my heart.

We had planned to begin the weekly meeting the Spring of 08, but in the fall of 07, I was hit harder than I had ever been hit. It was one of the most brutal, painful and even humiliating attacks I had ever experienced. I questioned God’s call on my life. I questioned whether or not it was even worth obeying Him if He was going to allow me and my family to be attacked so cruelly. As my family and I walked the path to restoration from that experience, and as the spring flowers began to bloom again—both in my yard and in my own spirit—I knew it was time to draw my line in the sand. Would I follow and obey or would I walk away from it all?


                I was sitting on my couch, about to open my Bible and journal, and the thought began to go through my mind, “I could put all of this behind me and never feel the embarrassment or ridicule if it fails. I could save myself and my family the accusations that I’m all about building my own kingdom….” And, as God as my witness, as soon as I began to process those thoughts, the Spirit of God within interrupted very clearly and said, “Shelley, I am doing something in the city of Atlanta and I’m inviting you to be a part of it. But if you tell me ‘no,’ I’ll find someone else who will do it.” And that was that. I surrendered to the call. And, I had NO idea what I was actually surrendering to. I just knew to whom I was surrendering—and that really is all that ever matters, isn’t it?
 God has taught me over the years that when I dream His dreams for me, I am:

Daring to Risk Everything for ALL that really Matters!
I had to come face-to-face with my fears and choose to trust God more than I trusted those fears. I had to get honest about what I was hanging onto as my “everything” and allow God to reveal to me what really mattered. And, as He has so faithfully led me along this journey—bringing amazing and wonderful people to walk this path alongside of—I’m overwhelmed by His tender, yet powerful grace that makes it possible for someone like me to do anything of value for Him in my generation.

I pray that Church 4 Chicks will outlast me. I pray that as doors open for us to take this ministry outside of Atlanta that God will be honored in such a way through what we’re doing, that many, many women—of all ages and all backgrounds and all walks of life—will find a place of grace to thrive and follow the dreams their Heavenly Father has placed in their hearts!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Michelle Wegner




I "met" Michelle nearly three years ago when I stumbled across her blog while searching for other PW's to connect with. Michelle and I are as different as night and day (and I'm not talking color...lol). But despite our many differences (she hates shopping or dressing up, and loves the outdoors...all of the things I am not....lol)we connected. She has been a great partner in prayer to Marc and I since we came to WABC. She loves to torture me with gross photos of animals (and feet) and I love to hear the stories of her very fashion forward daughters dragging her to the mall! I would have to say I have never come into contact with a more dedicated mom then Michelle Wegner. I especially love the heart that she and her husband Rob have for the mission field! I'm very proud to call Michelle Wegner friend!



Michelle and Rob have been married for eighteen years and have three girls, Madeline, Whitney, and Isabelle. They have served together at Granger Community Church for nineteen years. Every day is a new adventure, whether it's in India, or Indiana.






In January of 2011, Rob and I released our first book called Share the Well. It was a great experience writing it together.  Here’s a bit more info about it:


How did this project come about?
We have been dreaming about gathering the stories of the amazing men and women who are leading the charge in India. Their stories are remarkable, amazing,m and read like mini-novels. The men and women who work so hard to bring hope to the villages they live in and help are in the most remote places, with no outside voice to the world. We knew their stories needed to be told. We were excited to know the timing was right last summer.
Why India?
With 2.75 billion unreached people on the planet more than 50% of them live in one nation – India. In 2001, Granger Community Church found a new home in India.  From the first meeting of 15 people in an old run down YWCA, deep friendships were formed.  Those friendships turned into a partnership that has birthed an unstoppable movement transforming entire villages.
God has released a tidal wave of His Spirit in India.  In the last 10 years, over 950 churches have been planted, some of them in the most remote corners of unreached India.  120,000 people are now a part of this Jesus movement, gathering in over 950 churches, with over 84,000 who have received amazing grace and declared Jesus as Lord.   Like the early church, these numbers are growing every single day.
We trace the source of this tidal wave to a well.
Where Did the Photography Come From?
There were a few photographers that donated their time and skill to making our book not only full of amazing stories, but National Geographic quality photos as well.  Photographers Dustin Maust, and Ron Zimmerman travelled with us to India to capture the stunning photos that are in our book.
How Long Did it Take to Complete Your Book?
Truthfully, the stories from our book have been accumulating since 2001, but we started actively gathering them, writing them down, and taking photographs in the beginning of 2010. Our book was released in January of 2011, so about a year from start to finish.
How did you balance your life as you worked on your book?
When we actually gathered the stories to write them down this past summer, we packed up our whole family along with family friend Jeanna Tripp, who lovingly cared for our girls while Rob and I interviewed the men and women church planters for our book.  Once we got home, we began the work of translating our notes into stories that made sense. This fall, all 3 of our girls were in school all day for the first time ever, so I worked from the minute they left for school until the minute they got in the door.  Rob did his part at his office, and we exchanged many emails and phone calls back and forth editing details and re-writing each other’s sentences, and then writing them back to the way we wanted before the other edited them (slightly funny)  
Who Should Read it?
Anyone who wants to gain a further perspective about what life in a third world culture. Village life in India is of course, completely different than anything we as Americans have ever known.  The stories of survival and resilience that the men and women told us were truly remarkable. We wrote down their stories so others would be changed, but found ourselves forever changed as well.
Pastors and relief and/or development workers would also find our book interesting, since we have developed a tool called Bore Well church planting.
 Bore wells are common in India.  They are drilled and excavated by rotary-drilling machines that drill hundreds of feet under the earth--deeper than a hand-dug well could ever go.  A bore well reaches the clean water, keeping a village hydrated for many years.
If there’s water in a community, there’s life.  That’s the purpose of a bore well.
The concept of Bore Well Church Plating is simple - plant a church in an otherwise unreached village and then equip that church to become the hub for community development, bringing living water to every area of life. If the Kingdom of God comes to a community, it will elevate health, education, housing, employment, justice, arts, family life and more.  
What made us want to donate our proceeds to India?
We have everything we could ever need. We have running water. We have electricity. Our children get an amazing free education. We have all the food we need and even food we don’t need. When we visit with our friends in India who are living on less than a dollar a day, it is a no-brainer for us. We want to live our lives to give all we can to help those who don’t have what they need. We could have lined our pockets with cash made off of the stories of men and women who are impoverished, but that did not feel right. We want to show our girls and the rest of the world that giving back is what life is all about.  Every penny past the amount it cost to print the book goes to Bore Well church planters who are transforming the lives and communities of the villages they work in.
Can you speak a bit about the micro-enterprises? Can you give some examples?
Why is the micro-enterprise model so important?

We have experimented with various micro-enterprise models in southern India. Two examples that have been very successful have been goat herding and tailoring.  In one of the villages we are helping, the young teenage girls are much too old to begin school, since they would literally have to start in first grade with 6 year olds. They are now being trained in the trade of tailoring so they will be self-sufficient and break the cycle of extreme poverty in their own lives. We are also looking into purchasing a brick kiln. Brick making is one of the main industries of Southern India. Unfortunately, most of the workers are literally slaves to their bosses because of corrupt systems that use them and manipulate them into years of indentured servitude. If we owned a brick kiln and employed these men and women, they would be able to work their way out of extreme poverty very quickly.
You have three daughters who have been to India with you. How has that trip and your passion for India affected their lives?
Our oldest daughter Maddie has been to India with us three times, and Whitney and Isabelle have been with us twice.  Their world view is forever altered because of walking into the homes of children their age that are the same size as the play houses of their peers in America.  Watching my girls play with children who are in the “Untouchable” caste has been one of the biggest honors of my life--All children play in the same language.  
Our India experiences are something we have shared as a family, and they could never expect their friends here to understand, so they really don’t talk about it very much outside of home.  When they do bring it up, it is usually something very thought provoking and profound. The day we got home from India this last summer, Whitney stopped before she went into our house and said, “I never realized how huge our house is. It’s like a mansion compared to our friends in India”. 
The girls fight, argue, and make unreasonable Christmas lists like any kid, but deep down, they know to be so grateful for what we have. They like to remind one another of this, when they hear one of their sisters’s complaining. And of course, they are forever going to be reminded by us when they complain about what’s for dinner. Instead of a general, “Eat that, because there are starving people in Africa.” We tell them, “Eat that. Remember Sangeetha’s house? Remember how she had no toys and only one meal a day?” They roll their eyes like any kid would, but deep down they know that it’s the truth, and what it looks, smells, and feels like to live in extreme poverty.
The other night we tucked Isabelle in to bed and she asked for our book.  The next morning, she proudly told her daddy, “I read the whole book last night…well, not really read it, but I looked at every single page.” Rob said, “What do you think it’s about?” Belle replied, “I don’t know, but I know it is very, very important, and I am glad our family wrote it.”  
It will be interesting to see as the girls get older how these experiences will shape the rest of their lives. 
If you’re interested in supporting the church planting movement in Southern India, you can order a copy of Share The Well at: http://www.wiredchurches.com/granger-authors/share-well

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Eleana Garza

I'm not quite sure when Eleana and I became "friends", but we connected on twitter and facebook (see a pattern here with me and social media?...LOL). I gained a new respect for her at the Leading and Loving It Retreat. Eleana shared her story with me on the second night of the retreat. While others stood around us laughing and talking Eleana and I set on the floor of the lobby as I listened to her share her heartache and joys since coming to Christ and the struggles that her and her husband Joseph has faced since planting a church. She reminded me of all of the reasons I first wanted to make a connection with the wives of pastors (sometimes you just need someone to talk to)! I'm not sure Eleana was ready to share her story with the rest of the world but I'm so thankful she took up the challenge and agreed to guest blog! I know lives will be changed because of the things that she and Joseph have been able to conquer and the work that they are doing at New Generation Fellowship! Thank you Eleana for sharing your testimony with me. It was truly a blessing!


Eleana was radically saved and transformed at the age of 17 years old when she was admitted into a faith-based rehab for drug addicts. Well, since that radical conversion she has never been the same. Eleana & Joseph Garza started and pastor New Generation Fellowship in San Antonio Texas.  She likes blogging in her pajamas, lots of cheesecake, and black nail polish! She resides in San Antonio Texas with her husband Joseph Garza and her 4 beautiful children. Eleana is loving life, family, and ministry.

Joy Comes In The Morning!

In our last 10 years of ministry - I feel I have aged twice that. The hits life has given us, have challenged our faith, molded our character, rooted integrity within us, and made us most desperate for His presence in our life.

In every situation, we had to choose our reaction, a response. At times, I was so frozen by the pain, I was numb, and I felt I could go no more. I felt inadequate, spiritually, physically, mentally and the truth is....I was inadequate in every way. In the midst of each trial, each tragedy, each transition I could not go on in my own strength - it had to be in His strength.

As pastors we will deal with betrayal, people leaving you, leaving your church, gossip, and malice (those are just some of the few). My husband and I poured our lives, our finances, our resources, into a very dear family. We thought they knew us. We thought they knew our hearts. Our love for them, our love for our church, our love for the lost. And they left us. They left angry, they left offended, they left expecting more from us. They left and broke a piece of us in the process. As they spoke - I knew that nothing we said would matter. Nothing we said would make them stay. We stayed quiet. And they left.

You can only be betrayed by those you trust - those you are vulnerable too. And it hurt, it hurt deeply....why? Because we love them deeply.  The next few days - the puzzle pieces started coming together and all of a sudden I realized the knife that had been stabbed in my back was slowly turning and digging deeper.

Why would they say that about us, about my husband, about me, about my kids, why would they take others with them, why..........why didn’t they just talk to us.......why? I felt so alone. So Isolated.

I remember googling everything related to our pain but not much was out there....then I came across Leading & Loving It. I joined a virtual community group - not sure what it was - or if I should even participate...but I did....because deep down I desired to connect with other women that were in my same role and dealt with similar challenges. I am so glad I did. This virtual connection has been key in my ministry and personal life.

I remember calling Lori (founder of L&LI) and sharing my pain with her. I don’t know if she even knew but most of the phone call tears were quietly streaming down my face......not even because of the amazing advice, and words of encouragement she gave me (which were absolutely amazing - but would take up a whole other blog)....but just because she was there.

God did something incredible in my life, my heart and ministry during this time. Our team became closer and stronger than I could have ever imagined. Our people stepped up and started serving, and I felt stronger: spiritually, physically & mentally. In my brokeness I found a local pastor’s wife, mentor and friend, Denise Rion, who I am so blessed to have in my life. I found Lori Wilhite & Leading & Loving It and pw’s to do this ministry journey with! Joy came in the morning...

Pain is inevitable, but I refuse to allow pain, pettiness, malice or whatever to keep me from what God has called me to be. Ministry is the most exciting thing I have ever experienced, to see the life changes, marriages restored, the addicted set free - I want to be a part of that for the rest of my life. I had to make a choice to embrace the pain, cling to God, and continue to love people. Is it an easy choice?....well no it isn’t but us pastors wive’s were never looking to do easy :)!

If I can leave you with anything it’s this:
  Don’t stop embracing people - because of the fear of pain.
  Reach out to other PW’s or Women in Ministry that are going through pain.
  Get connected to Leading & Loving It
  & hold on to the vision God has called you and your family too because when you have a long-term vision the short-term problems won’t affect you as much.

...weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning. Psalms 30:5